Adolescent Life Coach
Possibly you received the news that
your child has been
arrested and your soul filled with alarm and grief.
Maybe you experienced sleepless nights waiting for your
child to return home. Perhaps you are exhausted from
daily contacts with the school or
legal system.
No one loves
your teenager like you do. At
Daybreak Counseling Services, we love teenagers and
we understand a troubled teen can take its toll on the
entire family.
As an
Adolescent Life Coach, I will help you and your teen
navigate through the maze of emotions,
misunderstandings, and difficult decisions.
I will:
-
Help you
develop a plan that works best for you and your
family
-
Provide
resources and assist you in advocating for your teen
-
Walk with
you and provide emotional support for each family
member
-
Work with
your teen to help them look at positive alternatives
to delinquency
-
Spend
quality time mentoring and encouraging your teen.
If your teen
is involved in any of the following behaviors or
activities, please contact me immediately:
In addition
we also provide confidential
anger management services
for employees of private industry and city government.
Our classes are held evenings and weekends. For an
appointment please contact us at 310-995-1202.
Just
another statistic-Gerald's Story
Great anger is more destructive than the sword.–
Tamil proverb
Gerald had rich dark chocolate skin, about the color
of a Hershey bar. His hair was jet black, short and
curly. Gerald grew up in a government housing project,
not far from one of Los Angeles’ beach communities. His
mother, Regina was Mexican- American. She had long black
hair with caramel skin. Regina lived in the same
neighborhood all her life. That’s where she met Gerald’s
Dad. She was sixteen when she got pregnant and Gerald’s
Dad began serving a life sentence only a few years after
that. At 32, Regina retained her urban beauty. She was
petite and feminine. In her earlier years, one could
imagine her being the object of desire for many men, but
now she looked tired. She looked spiritually weak. After
three children and string of draining relationships,
romance and the opposite sex was the last thing on her
mind.
Gerald was 15. He was placed on probation for
possessing a handgun. He swore that he had no gang
affiliation. His story was that he carried it for
protection. When I met Gerald, he was stoic and
obviously resistant to any counseling. Despite the
threat of incarceration, Gerald challenged his court
conditions and the
Probation Department by breaking curfew and ditching
school. He only agreed to comply with his anger
management court order to appease his mother.
After several years of counseling violent, angry and
self - destructive youth, I get a sense of the young
people who may have a measure of redeemable essence
inside them. Gerald had very little if any. Nevertheless
my savior complex kicked in and I convinced myself he
could be rescued.
At every session, Gerald would search for the
furthest corner of the room and isolate himself from me
and the other students in the class. He did not smile
and avoided participating in class discussion. When
called upon he would respond with icy one- word answers.
It became obvious to me that his participation was an
exercise in “playing the game”. This means doing the
minimum in an effort to avoid a probation violation. I
pressed on and hoped something would seep in on
accident.
As the weeks passed, Gerald’s attendance began to
drop. His mother desperately tried to cover for him, but
eventually I had to dismiss him from the class and
report his behavior to the court. I never saw Gerald
again but months later I received a call from his
mother, Regina.
She sounded frantic on the phone, “Mr. Munford this
is Regina, Gerald’s Mom do you remember me?” “Of course
I do”, I responded, “how is Gerald?” “Not too good she
stated” I could hear in her voice she was beginning to
tear up. “What happened?” I asked. “Gerald is in
juvenile hall. He was arrested for attempted murder. I
was wondering if, if there is anything you could do to
help? “They want to try him as an adult.”
I paused and thought about a documentary film I had
seen about 100 times. I make it a point to show it to
all my adolescent students. Gerald saw it too. The film
is called
Juvies and it documents the lives of several youth
in Los Angeles County Juvenile Hall. All the youth in
the film are facing lengthy and sometimes life sentences
in adult prison. As convicted felons, many of them would
be forced to serve decades in adult prisons. Some of the
youth are as young as 14 –years- old and are at risk of
physical and sexual assault at the hands of adult
murderers and child molesters. Suicide is often common
way out for these young offenders. I came back to myself
and asked Regina, “What do you need?” The best I could
do was to write a letter detailing Gerald’s
participation in my class that which was not much.
I made attempts to find out whatever happened to
Gerald but his mother never responded to my inquiries.
Fits of anger, violent outbursts, and physical
aggression affect far more people than the individual
out of control. Gerald’s actions will not only affect
him and his mother but will send damaging shockwaves
through the minds of his younger sister and brother. One
act of violence can have a negative effect on several
future generations
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